This week's farce.............















12 correct out of 20 picked = 60%









10 correct out of 20 picks = 50%




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Video is being shot in a couple weeks for "Multiplier NO!"

It'll be on You Tube, or The Toth's webpage or somewhere......I'll keep ya posted!

-E-

Naaaaaw.......

.....YA THINK?

And what's being done about this??

NOTHING!!! It's ENTIRELY LEGAL for oil companies to choke off supply at the bottleneck point (at the refinery).....thus, driving the retail price of gasoline up.








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I was looking at the website for this band that did a song for an iPod advert (the group is from France and is called The Prototypes)......and if you click on the tab on their website that says "photos", you'll see another tab open up called "us food"......

.....interest piqued, I opened this foto tab up only to find a layout of just two fotograffs....one of what appears to be a typical hamburger at a typical diner in the United States and the other has a sort of look of disdain from frontwoman Isabelle Le Doussal (which some musik reviewers have resorted to the "S" words when referring to: "Sexy", "Stunning", "Sassy", etc.....well, to each their own, I guess) whilst looking at this hamburger (I wish they would have shown the look on the hamburger as it looked at this woman's face).

I guess, that's supposed to be a subtle poke at American cuisine.

I only wish I had taken a photograph of this breakfast item that this guy made who hijacked my brother and sister at the Paris Gare D'Nord train station and talked them into staying at this strange weird guy's house (I thought something smelled weird and kept demanding that we stay at a youth hostel....but my siblings paid me no mind).

Anyways, when we woke up in this guy's attic, he invited us down to "whoore-ganique" (organic?) break-fast. Well, shit.....when Herve (the strange guy who talked my brother and sister into staying in his attic instead of a youth hostel) took off for a few minutes, I opened the oven, and Jesus Christ!

This thing looked like Devil's Tower in Close Encounters of the Third Kind. I think Herve called it a souffle...or a croissant....or some shit like that! I was just waiting for Francois Truffaut to come out and start playing the synthisizer!! Fucking thing looked JUST LIKE THIS PIC BELOW......same shape, same size, everything!!! Except that it had this look to it that was not purple, but rather the texture and colour of tan nagahyde!
















No, seriously.....you don't believe me or think I'm exaggerating?? Ask my brother!! He saw it!!

That's just the most bizarre thing I had seen there that the French would eat! There were others....

So eat me, Froggies!


-E-

Well, after celebrating......

......International celebrate American obesity and over-indulgence day *, it just struck me:

TODAY (and now, also tomorrow) is -

INTERNATIONAL BUY-NOTHING DAY

There are events being held all over to celebrate!! I was stunned when, in a culture as money-grubbing and materialistic as Denver, that they are even getting on the bandwagon:


DENVER, COLORADO
A local group sponsored by the Ringo Kamens Foundation will be hosting a protest against excessive consumerism that will coincide with international Buy Nothing Day.

There will be consumer cleansing/baptism, confession of shopping sins, music, and free giveaways. Visitors can also sign a pledge to buy nothing on Buy Nothing Day.

All media is welcome to attend. Those interested in joining, covering, or seeing the event should direct their inquiries to the Ringo Kamens Foundation Buy Nothing Day representative at 2600denver [at] gmail [dot] com.

DATE: NOV. 25 7:30 until approx 4:00
PLACE: Chambers Wal-Mart (5650 S Chambers Rd, Centennial)

1. If possible, bring a trash can to beat on so that we can make as much legal noise as possible.
2. Bring Adbusters flyers as well as consumer items you wish to recycle.
3. Come and if nobody is there, start protesting. Go inside the walmart (or other stores) and perform a mini whirlmart (walk around with an empty basket and get others to join you). This event is meant to shock people into thinking about their consumer habits.

Wear the most ridiculous clothing you own.


Although, I really shouldn't be surprised: I read my first ever issue of Adbusters in Denver in 1995.....

But sadly, the entire thing DOES beg questions that Adbusters doesn't answer clearly!! Errmmm......what about purchasing foodstuffs? Booze? Gambling against orangutans? Shit, should we just keep the computer off and that way, not have to buy electricity?? What ARE the parameters?

THIS brilliantly written piece helps give us an example.......and I just totally love this quote from the comment somebody made about this article: "....this is clearly unhealthy and can become an endless cycle of wanting, buying, discarding, and wanting more."

Um-hum......

Other resources for ignoring "Black Friday":

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15840733/


* - In the United States, this holiday is commonly referred to as "Thanksgiving"
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F.W.M.......

A friend of mine from Canada was quite stunned when he learned that the phrase "D.W.B." is NOT actually a joke and then he looked it up on Planet Zowie* and found all the proof he needed that it is a very real American phenomenon. Course, this same person was stunned shitless when they were scorned by co-workers after innocently using the term "Oriental"....but that's another P.C. debate for a later day!

So....what about this, then??

Some people I know have expressed major outrage.......Other friends have stated they are seriously relieved.....citing El Al's "successful" profiling of Muslims to avoid terrorist incidents on their planes.....and then there's Air Gord's profiling of ANYBODY who nods their head a lot whilst on a plane....

Jewish.....Muslim.....doesn't matter!













A) - DON'T act stoooopid on a goddamm plane!!
B) - Pray AFTER you land....that way you have more to be thankful in that the goddamm plane got there safely! Especially if you are a worse flyer than I am.....

*-REMEMBER: By copyright law, you cannot use the term "Googled" as a verb!!! It's a trademark, dammit!!!!



-E-

.....SMOKED!

Basted.....

Toasted.....

Burnt!!

In THIS week's quest for idiocy, Ernie and Bobo played 3 cards of five picks and one card of ten picks for a total of 25 picks each this week!






















17 correct out of 25 (no five-for-five cards....but all of his five-pick cards, that Funky Monkey got 4 outta five right) for a 68% correct guessing percentage! That'll get you a "D"!!!










12 correct out of twenty-five! This barely equates to a 48% correct guessing percentage!
This is quite embarrassing, actually.....

Who cares, though? BILLS WON THIS WEEKEND!!!







-E-

Wow....looks like those producers were right again!!!!!!!

OK, so they DID tell the Frat Boys From Hell that this movie "....was a documentary to be shown outside the U.S......" and there was NO lie there!!!!!!! You can see it in any number of nations outside the US.

(OK...so, they didn't exactly state "This documentary will NOT be shown inside the U.S." but still.....)

Now, a bunch of mad Romanians are suing 20th Century Fox Films, stating that they were mislead about the film, being told something along the lines of that it's going to be a documentary about rural poverty in Romania.....

Well, guess what: Borat producers are correct yet again!! I mean, come on - tell me you aren't living in grinding poverty when you and a few thousand of your fellow villagers are happy suing for the amount that this story claims:

























Wow! Thirty buxx for the entire village?? Wow....that could purchase over ten thousand Romanian mansions....or something like that!

Man, if shit's so bad there where you'd just be ecstatic sharing $30 with you fellow villagers, then, damm......I wanna live in Glod (Rhymes with 'Clod') Romania (or whatever it's called......)!

-E-

Is it me.......

....or did gas prices dip dramatically about three weeks before election day (like, around October 15th, it was about $2.24/gallon of regular unleaded here in PDX).......and then shoot upwards around November 8th or 9th (and for the past week or so, it's like $2.56 or so per gallon in Portland)?? I have no idea if this bizarre effect occurred nationwide, but for some reason......I suspect that it is not localised.

• Buffalo just had it's 70th homicide this year. On Hertel Avenue too.....man....and I was always under the impression that North Buffalo was one of the last remaining "safer" places in the city. I mean, I knew where my friend was gunned down isn't the best place in the world (Main and Leroy), but shit....come on: North Buffalo???

• And today's time-waster: http://www.atomfilms.com/afassets/flash/animator_v_animation2.swf

......Just another reason why my Antivirus software is Avast!

.....-E-

A Special Place In Hell.......



......also awaits these lovely individuals.

Special Place In Hell - Part I: Kaiser Permanente

I mean, HOW MUCH EFFORT does it take to locate a homeless shelter and to make sure that the shelter staff know this person is being discharged from the hospital???

Fucking profit-mongering HMO’s.....

H and the
M oney
O ver

.....AND the L.A. County DA’s office even tried to WORK WITH THESE PEOPLE (Kaiser) on establishing “guidelines” on patient discharging…..not "rules" or "statutes" but guidelines, for fuck's sake!!!

Diana Bonta, a Kaiser shill, stated “As soon as we heard about it, we said, ‘this is not how we do business.’ And we apologized”

READ: "how we do business is that our people generally DON’T get caught on camera doing this sort of thing."

Hospital officials also are instructed to notify Skid Row service providers in advance if they are sending a discharged patient there, and drivers must escort the patient inside, she said. Bonta said Kaiser has since stopped using taxis to transport patients to Skid Row.

READ: "Well, at least until this latest shitstorm dies down, anyways….."


Kaiser Permanente: "Live well......and Thrive"






Um-Hum.......



Special Place In Hell - Part Deux: Robert Tomlin, of Smithsburg, Maryland.

I really don't know what to say about this......except that this guy's place in Hell is going to be extra-special.....right next to that little-league coach who ordered the beaning of one of his ball players who is autistic because he didn't play as well as most of the other kids on the team.....and the coach wanted to discourage this autistic kid from playing.

That just about wraps up this week's edition of "Special Places in Hell"

Sadly, we'll probably have more soon......

















-E-

Ignorance of American Football Make Much Benefit for Glorious Lottery of Oregon.....

WHY do I still bother? Gosh....should I really be upset that Oregon is pulling this game after the end of this season??

















Nine correct out of 20 picks played for 45% correct!


















Errrmm........same as above (9 - 20 = 45%)

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Speaking of Make Glorious Benefit......I can't believe some fuckwitted Frat Boys From Hell who got drunk and were filmed on that Borat flick are NOW SUING the studio, claiming that it embarrassed them??

I mean, they are claiming shit like lost careers, lost internships, etc. etc. etc. because they were mislead by the crew filming this movie that this movie was ".....a documentary to be shown outside of the United States...."

Well, IT IS being shown outside the United States!!! I could go to Vancouver B.C. and see it or to Sussex, U.K. to go see it!!

Anyways, I mean, it's kinda like a bad defamation case where the persecuted person says/prints/posts truthful things and somebody who might be embarrassed by said items really just doesn't want that these things to actually see the light of day, so they threaten to sue (and never actually do end up filing, 'cause Civil Litigation attorneys STILL charge you for representation even if you lose a defamation trail), these Frat Boys From Hell were embarrassed by what they said on camera, and are grasping at straws to explain their behavior! Including suing in court in an attempt to have the scene deleted from the film!!!

If what the producers of the film did was so wrong, then WHY is the NATIONAL CHAPTER of this frat actually distancing themselves from these three fuckwitts???

I mean, legally....thee only long shot in hell they MIGHT have is if some Justice/Judge/Magistrate/lawyer-pretending-to-be-a-judge agrees that signing a release form is similar to a contract in that the four basic criteria of any binding business agreement (waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too boring to get into all of them here) HAVE ALL got to be met and that ONE of the four criteria was NOT met.

That being: Two parties have to both be deemed to be COMPETENT TO CONTRACT with each other. Well, intoxicated individuals, minors, individuals committed to mental institutions, etc. etc. etc. are NOT deemed to be competent parties to a contract in tort law.

For a judge to equate a release form to a contractual agreement, though.....that'd be a bit of a stretch.

DISCLAIMER - DO NOT take this to heart and as gospel truth.

I have literally seen some of thee weirdest shit happen at Civil Litigation....so nothing's iron-clad. Better yet, these are just generally accepted guidelines.....


Just that the sad part of this entire thing is that (allegedly) Pamela Anderson stated that she WAS aware and in on the filming during one of the final scenes in the movie.

THAT bothered me.....

Therefore, what IF this lawsuit is fake and that these Frat Boys From Hell aren't really actual Frat Boys but rather actors and doing this to drum up publicity for their movie??

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Speaking of law.....Jack Abramoff is reporting to prison today!!!

Life is good.....

YAY!! We're number 8 in the world......

...on a list that really matters!!



























(Oddly enough, unlike Fat Tire.....this is better on draught than it is in bottles. You won't have a fifty-fifty chance of good pint/bad pint when Dropping the Top and pulling the tap!)



-E-

Pic of the week.......




(Thanks to an astute reader of the 18,472,054th in D.C. for E-Mailing this to me)

LOVE this pic: Taken right after Santorum was told to file for the dole on Tuesday, November 7th at....ooooh....around 11:30PM Eastern Time. Looks like his daughter just typed in her dad's last name into Google and clicked on the first result that was listed (NOTE: Do NOT try this if you are easily offended by.....uuuhhh.....well, by things like "Santorum").

• THIS week's Bet-The-Farm-Pick:
  
  Take favoured Seattle (+6) to easily cover that against St. Louis!!
  
  Now, take EXACTLY what I say to do above and do the opposite!!! HEY REMEMBER: I got ONE out of TEN correct on a card last week, so........
  
  
  -E-

Made a Macaque outta me.....


Well, I WAS INITIALLY touched by His Noodly Appendage (as I came out $75 ahead at BioSphere III - a.k.a. Seneca Niagara Casino and Hotel and got a killer suite on the cuff outta the deal)......but the FSM's blessed touch soon left me when it came time for this past weekend's football picks!

And Now......

.....man vs. primate! Starring nobody's favourite human, Ernie and everybody's favourite macaque, Bobo!!

This week. something got lost in translation between myself and the bartender at my former Local who was playing mine and Bobo's picks.....and it was loud, alcohol was involved, and I was tired and couldn't hear her, so Ernie accidentally ended up doing 18 and Bobo accidentally went for 12 picks.

It's all right. NO worries!! Since I fucked this up.....winning cards don't matter, we're just gonna do a percentage of winning picks!

......so.....?????

















Bobo Macaque! A stunning upset....going four out of 12 for 33% correct!












Ernie Macaque? An even more stunning FIVE OUT OF EIGHTEEN!!!! For a correct percentage of 27.7%!! And this includes an AMAZING performance by Ernie, where, on a 10-pick card, he actually went ONE correct out of TEN picks made! UNPRECEDENTED....even in the annuals of thee ten worst Oregon Lottery Sports Action Performances on record in Salem!!!!!

"Well....I was just playing down to the level of my opponent" said The E on a long-distance phone call from Western New York to This Blog, when asked to explain his horseshit performance this weekend.....

....Ernie then excused himself and said he had to take this, as he accepted a congratulatory telephone call from George Allen-Witz.....


Is it just me....or is it JUST A SLIGHT TOUCH SEXIST that Oregon's State Lottery doesn't believe in the concept of female football fans! 'course.....birds who are into Football would NOT under ANY circumstances dress as idiotic during a Sunday match on TV as these three bozos do:









Ooooh....I'd say that is a touch sexist. Especially considering that say, oh....my sister, for one example, probably can comfortably go into far greater depth when talking about the NFL than these three guys combined! And whass up with the cheezy wood paneling? "Honey, you've misbehaved...." says the woman of the house "......so now, as punishment, go to the wood paneling room and think about what you've done for a while!!!"


-E-

Wait…..you got……


…the wrong guy….

Funny stuff. Flew back to Buffalo to vote in the elections for my Indian tribe and somehow ended up in First Class on both directions, coming and going. A day later when my mum and I went to be trapped for two days without contact with the outside world in BioSphere III (a.k.a. – Seneca Niagara Casino and Hotel), instead of a standard room (which itself is amazing), they put us in a suite that was stunning, most likely one of thee three nicest hotel rooms I have ever stayed in…..and probably went for more for a night than I make in a week!



Interesting election.

Looooooved the TV adverts basing Harold Ford, the Democratic Candidate for US Senate from Tennessee. Click below...you reeeeaaaaly have got to see this!

“Harold - *wink* call me!” (is what the actress is mouthing at the end of this advert), implying that he fooled around with a white woman that “met Harold at a SuperBowl party at The Playboy Club” in Jacksonville.

Well, Ford, who happens to be SINGLE, stated in response something along the lines of “Well, I like girls, beer and football……soooo….?”

This flies directly in the face of what a good ‘ole red-blooded American Boy is, according to the Republican Right! To them, what a good ‘ole red-blooded American Boy is NOT somebody who likes girls, beer and football….but rather a "man’s man" who instead is really into Jesus, adolescent boys and Instant Messaging!

So, between the fact that it looks like the Republican (Bob Corker) will win the Tennessee race….and that George "Macaqa-Witz" Allen is gonna win in Virginia....not much HAS changed in “The ‘ole South”, has it then?? Guess ya gots ta keep da Brutha Man down!

As I sit here in an extremely dingy Days Inn – Buffalo Airport (Norfwess Airline had some serious mechanical issues which made my late-night-last-flight-of-the-day to PDX get downgraded to “as if” status), I find out that Ass-face Joe Liberman won despite losing the primary…..sad, really……

...and NOW, AssBoy Tom Reynolds (R-NY) is making his victory speech in Western New York!

…..and they have JUST announced that the Republicans are no longer in power in the U.S. House of Representatives….and might veeeeery well lose control of the U.S. Senate!


Shit…..hmmmm…..maybe I WILL put off that move to Canada for a little while…….


Wow……is it me, or does James Carville just literally NOT look human at all???

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Get me home to my pee-pole....please.....

-E-

Few notes from Western New York......

....this election eve.

• Ain't goin' to The Bills match against The Packers today. Figured that about 35% of the people on my Detroit-Buffalo flight last night were from Green Bay.....ahhhhh....so THAT'S why the game was sold out

• So instead, I am re-entering the Biosphere III (also known as the Seneca Niagara Casino and Hotel) with my mum again instead of being at Rich Stadium (or whatever the hell it's called this week)! Just like Biosphere II, everything you need is right there....no need at all to leave....heck, they even gave me the hotel room free. Golly.....THAT'S gotta cost 'em! Wonder how they make any money....?

• Watching election weekend coverage on Sunday Morning. As they were analysing the race between Jim Webb and George "Macaca-witz" Allen in Virginia, I looked at the scrolling bulletins at the bottom of the screen......and how it mentioned about how Jimmy Carter is going to be in Nicaragua along with a team of "international election monitors"! Just saw a really good show on HBO last night called Hacking Democracy and it begged the question: How come we don't have international election monitors in the United States???

http://www.blackboxvoting.org/








Shit.....still wondering if I dropped my ballot into the mailbox in time.....

Bobo is back to challenge! Sadly, I left the Sports Action tix back in The Hills of Cedar! Bobo-Ernie challenge results available here on Wednesday evening!

-E-